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Archive for December, 2019

priorities

December 10th, 2019 at 02:49 pm

The holidays are upon us and once again the hassle will start i should just jump right in.

I cancelled Christmas one year, i had zero help was working OT in retail and DH thought i should be able to do it all NOPE. I know he was mad and continues to remind me of that fateful year. This year our kids are grown they have different lifestyles and interests and do not need Stuff just because. I want to honor that wish and no longer give gifts out of obligation......... but as always.... DH will wait until last second and ask what did you get for x/ y or z??????
I tried to get ahead of the issue by saying do you want more knick knacks we don't need? ... well neither do they. it is not sinking in his thick skull.

I told him i am not sure we should even buy anything but a small item for grandkids as their other side of family ( dollar store type) fills their house with tons of garbage toys that they play with a few times and forget or break.
In the last year etc we just added money to a fund we started for them but once again DH is off on a buy garbage bonanza. He seems dismayed that some items are backorder and will not be available until january.....DUH it is midway in December.

This along with the fact we have personal business to take care of by end of year but he seems to think we have lots of time is driving me insane.

I get so much stress i just shut down. last week DH bought dinner on way home and only wanted a sandwich one night so in this weeks grocery i bought bare minimum ..... I buy with a meal plan in mind (yes it is communicated) but lately he is getting home earlier then me and (who knows why he has not done this in months) starts cooking something entirely different then the plan. throws off all my ingredients especially fresh items that do NOT last until next week. I have cut way back on produce because of this tired of throwing money away.
I have come to the point where i want to act like roommates buy your own food and leave me out of it.

This is the one time of year he simply does not stay with plans or evidently pays zero attention.

Last minute appease him BS costs me every year and simply put i do not have the extra as the company i am temping with shuts down for 10 days from Christmas to past new years and i will not have a check.
Maybe i just need to vent or maybe i need suggestions on dealing with the holiday disconnect.





sentimental Garbage

December 7th, 2019 at 06:45 pm

Perhaps a strange title but i was looking around my house and noticed. there are some items that need to go.

Example my son a couple of years ago managed a store at a mall and then he bought me (well meaning) a ton of scented lotions from one of those shops like Bodyworks, you know then buy three get 3 great idea if you have 6 people.. but nope mom got all 6 used some tried different scents but honestly i could grease up an elephant with this volume. I have it in a line on counter try to use as I can but in all honesty the only reason I am keeping is sentimental not functional. i have hovered over the bin but put them back on counter telling myself to use more.

I have many items like this. When my mom passed I took items from her home as memories but also because i knew she loved them . Items costume jewelry i may never wear, candles i have in boxes perhaps in a major power outage i could burn them .... pictures I have never hung .... they do bring memories but as i get older I realize they mean nothing to my own adult kids i tell them stories they nod politely but a 3rd generation candy dish is not going to be a treasure for them.
Some items may mean something to siblings but i do not talk to them at all i am thinking in some cases i took items more so they would not take and sell them at the urging of relatives ( couple siblings have issues with substance abuse) but i did not need or want some items. I am not even sure how i could return these item to them have not spoken in years. i see now sooner or later memories disappear and who know maybe these item will be a garage sale after I am gone.
what is the best way to let go.....

how much for happy

December 5th, 2019 at 01:55 pm

I know as a financial site we discuss saving tips /good deals /better interest rates etc.
It is fun to see some bloggers get excited and inspired as they climb out of debt or start a journey into financial fitness. Even reading about items some do for fun.

I am on good footing lately but I am not I would say satisfied or really happy.
I have been talking to others and see that all jobs have problems and perhaps I should find a distraction like e-book or game to fill my time.
I am paid well for very little work. while great for me it is emotionally draining as I know people ARE paying a lot for the products this company is developing (medication) so i can play candy crush.
Ever wonder why prescriptions cost so much?

My savings and financial picture is making great strides and I am feeling ill about it.

The area we live is congested and sucky and so we seldom go out .... no spend days are so simple for me but I am bored. i wonder if it is a phase or just the way it is.
I listen to others at work and most people seem in similar situations of boredom and dissatisfaction. Many resort to eating. none look happy or even smile.
I have actually watched some gain weight since being hired.

I guess I need to find more hobbies or something.
i am tired of going to another placement after another to find same attitudes and disappointment.
Most of the fun or engaging jobs I have had were lower end and now that my resume shows a higher level most lower end pass thinking they could not pay as well or I would leave.
Life is about more then how much you make or at least i would hope so.

back to work

December 2nd, 2019 at 02:33 pm

so i had a long weekend off the check for this week will be sad but as this is just extra income I am OK.

I went to a dermatologist as I had a new odd growth looked like a mole had all the " signs" the articles etc tell you to look for irregular edges / rough texture/ changing color /itchy etc.
Took this DR 15 seconds to say "Nope, it is a common benign growth ( long weird name) that has zero chance of cancer"
I was relieved but also felt a bit silly. i told him that i had been reading and this met many of items to look for and he said " yep see people all the time that DO NOT need to be here based on some fear mongering skin cancer article".
I was surprised by his candor and wonder how many people are taking time for appointments I missed 2 hours of work and paying co-pay etc for this sort of thing. Perhaps this is why we have such a medical care problem in this country... people who put stuff off or people clogging the system for no reason.

I KNOW i will think twice before running in based on "SIGNS" to look for not just misleading articles but if you look up in a site on internet often say the same thing.
this is new insurance so i am not even sure yet what this will end up costing me.